um well jeez, go ahead and describe my frustrations, why don’t you?
Written by Cleo Plagg. Found here.
Dear People Who Judge My Single, Post-College Lifestyle,
I am 27 years old, and on occasion I still drink until I throw up. In the case I do not throw up, I usually eat twice the calories I normally do the following day. Sometimes I even get drunk…
I love it when I get absolutely pointless branding e-mails from the company President about our “truly global brand.” It’s like, “Dear Mr. President, do you realize that email had absolutely zero value and all you accomplished with it was to waste a few seconds of my precious life?”
Spoke to the parents this morning and the first thing my dad had my mom ask me was if I’ve gotten fat. I was confused - why the sudden concern over my weight? Mom explained that my sister e-mailed them some photos from the party and I look like I’ve gained weight. Thanks, dear parents! I’ve actually dropped down to 0/2 from 2/4 since I saw them back in September. But they insisted I look heavier. Good thing I ran a couple of miles last night and have been on a healthy foods kick since then - dressing-less salad, fruits, V8 instead of a soda and Greek yogurt. We’re going to ignore the martini from last night - hey, I was helping a friend celebrate his bonus and grad school application so it can’t count!
(Source: saltwater-roomings, via inherhazeleyes)
And realizing just now that I wasn’t really uncomfortable even though I was bored last night, I realize just how much I’ve grown in the last four years. Four years ago I used to feel super uncomfortable around these same people and used to find every excuse to not attend or just go find a corner to hide in when I had to attend. Then I left home to attend grad school and came back a version of myself I really like and most importantly finally comfortable in my own skin. Don’t get me wrong, I still have improvements I’m trying to make, but my point is, wow look I’m comfortable with who I am and I don’t feel like an awkward loser if I don’t have someone to hang out with at a party!
Ok so the wearing a sari and attending a 99% Bangali gathering wasn’t torture or anything. But I just did not feel comfortable in a sari! Sure I was bored at the gathering because they were all my sister’s friends and all married and in their late 30s/early 40s with one or two kids, but I wasn’t uncomfortable. But the sari…every time I had to stand up, walk, or move more than slightly, I was worried things were going to come undone. I know I looked fake and awkward in all the pics from last night, but that’s because I felt fake and awkward.
This phase of my life is supposed to be about exploring the Bangali in me. So naturally, when my sister suggested I wear a sari for a party tonight, I agreed without any objections or conditions. Well actually I did have one condition - I will not wear all black. So I’m doing this - wearing a sari for the first time ever. I even got my hair did and currently I’m wearing 2 lbs of makeup. Okay, not really the makeup. This is either going to be fun and normal or a total disaster. Either way, I’m exploring the Bangali in me, which, although I was born in Bangladesh, is not something that comes naturally at all.
A couple of weeks ago my boss and I had a disagreement about the proof needed for a specific type of document in a specific state. Between us it ended with me leaving for lunch early just to get away from her, and her taking those files from me and giving them to some poor sucker.
Her reasoning for being right in that argument was that the proof was decided on by our Director and VP.
I still stuck to my guns because if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my two months in this place, it’s that things haven’t always been done properly. Example: on my second week I discovered that we were not collecting complete proof for a very different but very important document. That has since been remedied, but not before it caused a whole lot of struggle between us, higher administration, and our auditors.
In that case my boss trusted my knowledge instead of putting up a fight with me, so I’m not quite sure what prompted the one in this. But whoever else she must have passed these files on to apparently asked for the same proof I was insisting on. Yesterday those files reappeared on my desk with exactly what I had insisted on having, along with emails from the Director of another department asking for that proof.
So me = 1 more (because I’ve already lost count of all our back-and-forths) and her = 1 less.
Lesson learned: trust my gut because my gut comes with my experience and some very expensive education.
So tired that the area below my desk is looking like a perfectly cozy spot to curl up on. Fortunately I’m not that desperate. Yet.
Words I always remind myself
(Source: lyrics2liveby)
